What's the most important thing, George Michael?

 We're driving to school, and the boy is sitting next to me in shotgun. He likes to ride up front.

I look at him because he's eating something, and ask what's for breakfast.

He doesn't answer, but I can tell he is absolutely POUNDING down pieces of salt water taffy that my Beloved got from the Jersey shore the weekend before.

"Boy, what are you doing eating all that candy for breakfast?!?"

"Mom said if I'm going to eat taffy, I should do it early in the day."

"Bud, I am pretty sure this is NOT what she meant."

"Oh."